A Story of Two Brothers
By Rob Sheftic
Staff Writer
By Rob Sheftic
Staff Writer
On a crisp autumn day in the fall of 2001, a fourteen-year-old boy is outside playing with his neighborhood friends when he sees his older brother stop by to see the family, shortly after moving out of the house. As his older brother walks up the driveway and past his younger brother with a “ hey what’s up little bro” the boy realizes that there really isn’t much a brother-brother relationship going on here; in fact, there hasn’t been any type of relationship going on at all. The one thing that stands out between them is that they’re both sporting their favorite football team by wearing their New England Patriot hats.
When you and your brother are ten years apart, in most cases it will be difficult to really form any kind of bond. When you’re ten and he’s twenty, you’re really not going to be spending much time together or hanging out because there’s just too much out in the world that a twenty-year-old can be doing. You as the younger brother have your own friends,. and there just really isn’t any reason that you would be hanging out with a twenty-year-old. There isn’t much that you can talk about because with an age separation like that, you’re each experiencing completely different things and you couldn’t possibly relate to each other. One thing that we did have in common, and really all that seemed noticeable was that we were each brought up to be fans of the New England Patriots and up until 2001; that was all my brother and I had.
That same day in the early fall of 2001 as my brother was getting ready to leave, he asked me a question that 1. I had never heard before and 2. Left me in shock... he asked me to come over the next day and watch football with him. Now just the question alone had left me with a feeling I really never felt before. My brother who looks forward to every Sunday, watching his team go out onto the field and compete, and here he is asking me to be a part of that with him. I played it "pretty cool" simply saying “yeah that sounds good, I'll see you at game time." Meanwhile, inside I'm ready to burst because I'll get to experience a Sunday during the football season with him. As I went to sleep that Saturday night, I remember finding it very hard to shut my eyes because all I could do was imagine what the day would be like ahead of me.
The sun came up that morning and I simply couldn't sit still. I had to go for a morning run just to get moving. I was just too excited to sit around and wait for game time to roll around. I arrived fairly early to watch some pre-game with him, and the rest is all history. Since that day in 2001, there have only been two or three instances where we didn't watch the Patriot's games during the football season. There just isn't much that's going to stand in our way of not watching the games together. From blizzard weather conditions during the winter all the way to a severely sprained foot (where I could not drive and he came and picked me up.) If I count it up, that would make this on-going season the seventh season that we continue our tradition.
What makes this whole story perfect for me is that it’s more than just football. Since that first game together were able to talk about anything that not just brothers would talk about, but best friends. We talk on the phone or text message now nearly every day. In 2005 he was married and I was the best man at his wedding, and shortly after his wife had a baby boy. I am proud to be the boy’s Godson. Day in and day out you see a relationship that for about sixteen years just wasn’t there. He’s always there if I need to talk, as I am there for him. For me it’s really tough to put into words that you can understand, it’s simply just been a blessing and a joy for me knowing that I now have that brother that I technically always had, but that I now have that brother-brother, actually more like best friend to best friend relationship.
When you and your brother are ten years apart, in most cases it will be difficult to really form any kind of bond. When you’re ten and he’s twenty, you’re really not going to be spending much time together or hanging out because there’s just too much out in the world that a twenty-year-old can be doing. You as the younger brother have your own friends,. and there just really isn’t any reason that you would be hanging out with a twenty-year-old. There isn’t much that you can talk about because with an age separation like that, you’re each experiencing completely different things and you couldn’t possibly relate to each other. One thing that we did have in common, and really all that seemed noticeable was that we were each brought up to be fans of the New England Patriots and up until 2001; that was all my brother and I had.
That same day in the early fall of 2001 as my brother was getting ready to leave, he asked me a question that 1. I had never heard before and 2. Left me in shock... he asked me to come over the next day and watch football with him. Now just the question alone had left me with a feeling I really never felt before. My brother who looks forward to every Sunday, watching his team go out onto the field and compete, and here he is asking me to be a part of that with him. I played it "pretty cool" simply saying “yeah that sounds good, I'll see you at game time." Meanwhile, inside I'm ready to burst because I'll get to experience a Sunday during the football season with him. As I went to sleep that Saturday night, I remember finding it very hard to shut my eyes because all I could do was imagine what the day would be like ahead of me.
The sun came up that morning and I simply couldn't sit still. I had to go for a morning run just to get moving. I was just too excited to sit around and wait for game time to roll around. I arrived fairly early to watch some pre-game with him, and the rest is all history. Since that day in 2001, there have only been two or three instances where we didn't watch the Patriot's games during the football season. There just isn't much that's going to stand in our way of not watching the games together. From blizzard weather conditions during the winter all the way to a severely sprained foot (where I could not drive and he came and picked me up.) If I count it up, that would make this on-going season the seventh season that we continue our tradition.
What makes this whole story perfect for me is that it’s more than just football. Since that first game together were able to talk about anything that not just brothers would talk about, but best friends. We talk on the phone or text message now nearly every day. In 2005 he was married and I was the best man at his wedding, and shortly after his wife had a baby boy. I am proud to be the boy’s Godson. Day in and day out you see a relationship that for about sixteen years just wasn’t there. He’s always there if I need to talk, as I am there for him. For me it’s really tough to put into words that you can understand, it’s simply just been a blessing and a joy for me knowing that I now have that brother that I technically always had, but that I now have that brother-brother, actually more like best friend to best friend relationship.
2 comments:
Reading your story was very touching for me. I can relate myself to your older brother. I am the older sibling while my brother is 11 years younger than I. I work very hard at our relationship by always having him up with me for weekends, frequently visiting him, calling him, doing things with him etc. I feel as the older sibling, it is my responsibility and duty to reach out to my brother and show him that I want to be close to him. My goal is to always be close to my brother, age is just a number and I think that is the mind frame you need in order to be close with any sibling----you must open yourself up and try.
There will always be an "empty space" between two 10 years apart persons, in my case, my older sister and I, but that "emptiness" is about the life she lived before I was born and not about the differences which mostly unify us. Even now, at 9 years after her marriage, and 5 and 2 years after the births of my 2 beautifull nephews, we can always go back in time and be ourselves (as kids). Yes, i can't deny that her choices and mine, as well, putted us on two different paths in life, and that there will always be something that I don't know about her and vice versa, but the thing is that she will be the only humankind closer to me, after my parents will die, than anyone else, and the one which will know me for the real me and who will open her heart and her door no matter what! One of my best friends has also an older sister, and sometimes I thought I was a little beat jealous over their very close relationship, but things aren’t always what they seem to be, and after I found out about the incapacity of her older sister to get pregnant I understood the psychological impact and the need to be a mother for her younger sister (my friend), and therefor their so very close relationship. As my father says, we cannot be free if we depend on others, and others depend on us (even emotionally). In conclusion, I can consider myself to be free for the most part of my existence, but also loved.
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